"I've come here to kick ass and chew bubblegum. And I'm all out of bubblegum."
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*points to bedroom* This is where we frick frack.

*points to kitchen* This is where we snick snack.

*points to living room* This is where we kick back.

*points to bathroom* This is where we shit shat.

*points to couch* This is where we chit chat.

*points to computer* This is where we click clack.

*points to shelf* This is where we knick knack.

*points to sex dungeon* This is where we paddy-whack. 

What a truly awful website this is

(via beefaloh)



All those times you thought you felt a text message were actually a cute lil ghost who wanted to be your friend.

You monster.

oh my god no i feel so bad

(Source: hejibits.com, via beefaloh)